I was surprised to learn from the energy auditor that the fancy ventilation fan located in the bathroom, isn’t really a courtesy fan for sucking noxious odors from the loo. For over thirty years, I assumed the fart fan allowed large families to live in relative peace devoid of gagging while sharing a residence with single bathroom. There always been one of those unspoken rules. If you must, and sooner or later one must, for the consideration of others, please turn on the damn fart fan. In retrospect, it’s effectiveness at creating breathing environment is questionable at best, but at least that announcing hum detected in the hallway is a coded announcement to others, you might want to consider waiting a few moments before entering to check for spinach on your teeth.

The auditor casually mentioned the ventilation fan, for excessive bathroom moisture vented directly into the attic rather than through the roof, potentially a hazard for mold growth in the attic. Technically the unvented fan is a problem, but it won’t be addressed immediately given the fan isn’t actually utilized for its intended purpose. However the dryer venting into the attic was another story…

A no-no due both to humidity and potential mold issues, but the potential fire hazard was a deal breaker. On the bright side the lint provided an alternative insulation until the contractors arrived and blew the attic with materials officially sanctioned for such purposes.

On the recommendation of the insulation contractor, we hired a handyman to reroute the dryer vent through the basement to the outside of the house. On the last day, the hangman was running late because he had to pick up his kid, which wasn’t a problem until he brought his kid along when he finished the job.

He was a typical six-year old boy: energetic, full of questions, and utterly unable to sit quietly and entertain himself. I listened to the Better Half play three minutes of the question game, and defend the cat’s honor, as I stared at the lasagna box on the kitchen counter. For Better or worse, for thicker or thiner, but where children are concerned, it’s every woman for herself.

Since we spent the afternoon waiting for the handyman, we weren’t able get all the ingredients for dinner, which the Better Half was cooking. Without a second thought, I found my car keys and fled the scene. The Better Half was on his own, and far more experienced at dealing with kids, I might add. If the handyman wasn’t going to supervise his own child, I wasn’t about to do it for him.

When I returned with the groceries, I took over dinner, my strategy being to stick with the devil you know. The Better Half found himself making paper airplanes and listening to Shel Silverstein books, while I slaved over followed the directions on the lasagna box with the liquor cabinet keeping me company, and the cat was safely sequestered under the sofa. Later, the BH thanked me for dinner and apologized for the way the afternoon went. The irony was both of us thought we had the easier job.

Our power company offers a free energy audit and a rebate of fifty percent on recommended improvements completed up a thousand dollars expended (maximum rebate $500). This is a higher return consumer dollars than the income than the energy efficiency tax deductions currently offered by the federal government, which is a 30% for things like windows and insulation.

For the last 2 months we have been working through the recommendations and already see some results from the effort. The last items is upgrading insulation in problem areas like attics, and floor/ceiling of the basement. As an aside, I know why people don’t bother with sealing cracks in windows and band joists, as it is a righteous pain in the ass.

There is a sitting room connected to the master bedroom that cantilevers from the main floor with unenclosed storage underneath for things like lawnmowers and garden implements. This room is a problem area. With cathedral ceilings, a skylight and no direct ventilation from the ac unit, it remains 5-10 degrees out of synch with the rest of the house depending upon season.

The insulation guy suggested we remove the plywood that protects the flooring insulation from the outside elements and add furring strips to the joist so the floor could accommodate thicker insulation, then resealing the area with house wrap before re-installing the plywood and sealing cracks with expanding foam or caulk. This plywood removed, didn’t fit tightly so there were small cracks and in one instance a 8 x 8 inch access hole. The decaying insulation in some locations was not surprising but the body count was:

3 dead squirrels (natural causes. By natural, I mean not at the mercy of spouse’s pellet gun)
5 hornet nests(thankfully abandoned)
2 bird nest (probably wrens)
2 critter nest of mysterious occupancy (conveniently made out of existing insulation)

This is the largest of the hornet nests. It is about the size of a saucer. The paper walls don’t wrap around the bottom, like open nests. I’m guessing these has to do with the confined space. The form reminds me of a sunflower.