Comments on: Fragmentation

By: jaded

jaded — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 19:22:31 +0000

Bob, I understand the contradiction component. It's a delicate operation, to oppose without provoking, especially if you share the same bed. Hence I refrained from making a scene. However, I have yet to detour the whole sulking process.

By: Bob

Bob — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 16:23:43 +0000

Some people (I guess I am one, sometimes) who are embarrassed when their spouse contradicts them in public. Less problematic, but sometimes equally embarrassing, is when a spouse has a different opinion on a topic and says so in public. It’s as if Laura having a different opinion makes mine less valid, or implies that we don’t have a strong relationship when actually, the opposite is true – when two people can believe in two different ways yet can maintain a marriage (or friendship) it demonstrates that you aren’t threatened by different beliefs/opinions.

it’s hard.

By: jaded

jaded — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 02:32:08 +0000

meno, by flip I take it you don’t mean the bird…yadda yadda yadda, family is hard work. We all lose sleep over it sooner or later, dude, where’s my cat.

By: meno

meno — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 21:35:53 +0000

Reasons to marry an orphan.

Flip answer, but that’s all i got, because nothing i say will be useful. Just understanding.

By: jaded

jaded — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 20:26:26 +0000

Bob, I have choices, but are only available when it is just the two of us. In more populated situations, there is this pressure to conform; either in the way he leads conversation, or constant prompts to behave certain ways. Similar to the method a parent uses to prompt a child to say please and thank you. Yes, relationships are about compromise, which is the reason I'm not contemplating any drastic measure. I will feel empty, and eventually the burn will disappear, and things will return to normal, whatever that is. I suspect before year's end, I will find myself in a similar situation and again feel the way I do now.

By: Bob

Bob — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 18:17:58 +0000

I’m sorry. you make it sound as if you have no choice but to either accept his way or not. Is there no room for compromise from him? No one should have to give up who they are – there is always a line which cannot be crossed. That being said, relationships are inherently about compromise. it is a two-way street.

I hope you can find a middle ground that allows you to be you.

By: jaded

jaded — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 14:18:39 +0000

De, I'll probably do as I always do; wait and refrain from saying or doing impulsive, and go through the motions until it feels like routine.

By: De

De — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 19:29:41 +0000

I’m sorry. It sounds like you’re in a bad place. Thoughts on what to do?