working in the yard in broad daylight on an ordinary Monday. Our attempts to invest sweat equity into our home do not go unnoticed by contractors patrolling residential neighborhoods for economic opportunity. The state of the economy is reflected by the number of cold calls beckoning at our doorstep. Tis a terrible time to have a house on the market, but a good time to contract for home repairs, at least here, and especially for cash.

Lured by three untouched pallets pavers littering the front door, a pair guys in a beat-up taurus wagon, attempted to negotiate installation. We were not swayed as most of the prep work has been completed. Had they shown up prior to the excavation of dirt, and sandstone, the temptation to negotiate, might have been stronger. Yet, the kicker, was the discover these two yahoos were responsible for installing the shitty path, I spent weeks removing because it was an unstable lawsuit waiting to happen. We were polite, a thanks but no thanks, gentle dismissal.

I admire their tenacity, going door to door, trying to put food on the table, but there are some services you can’t afford no matter what a bargain they are. The willingness to work isn’t enough to cancel out the know-how which brings a project to fruition. If they had installed the path, any less than perfect, I would have never been unable to live with my spouse, as he would speak of little else than a job not perfectly executed. You have to be careful, frequently you get what you pay for.

And so the paver path continues, well not the path, so much as the preparation, and it progresses in the tradition of DIY. Slowly, painfully, with much sighing and sweat. My husband has done this before. Each time the pattern is different and the complexity varies. He installed a straight path, at the shared home with his former wife, in his former life, thus making him the master paver layer. We worked to together laying a path and patio at our former home. No easy task with a curving herringbone pattern that required numerous cuts and the sacrifice of a circular saw.

It would natural to assume the process has become easier, but it would be an incorrect assumption. This path is simpler, no cutting required, yet he still struggles with the foundation, the dimensions, and his controlling effort to perfect that, which still has a plus and minus margin of error. When he becomes overwhelmed by the inconsistencies that require him to punt, he returns to the digging, sometimes massive amounts of earth moving, and other times packing the moved earth back into place. This is part of his struggle, something he needs do to complete the task.

He would like nothing better than for me to stand around and listen to him think. That is the most painful part of the process. He doesn’t really want input, but validation. I need to move, even if it is small increments, hauling mulch or weeding flower beds. As for validation, it’s not as though I don’t appreciate his efforts. If wants to be the master paver project foreman, he needs to lead the project, and assign me tasks. I don’t need to watch him find his way, I know he will, it just takes time.